It is one thing to believe that God is a forgiving God, quite another thing to believe that He has forgiven “me.” For many of us, self-forgiveness is more difficult than forgiving others.
This is especially true if someone has done something contrary to what he wants to believe is true about himself. Do you know what I am talking about? We begin by assuring ourselves, “I would never, ever, do that.” Then, in an unexpected moment of weakness, we find ourselves doing the very thing that we were confident we would never do.
Such moments are very disillusioning. We all hold to moral illusions about ourselves that need to be “dis-ed.” This is probably why the moment we assure ourselves that there is something we would never do, we soon find ourselves doing it. And God will let us, because He wants us to reject illusions of our own goodness in favor of a more honest appraisal.
Oswald Chambers once noted, “We are never nearer to greatness than when we are face down at the foot of the cross.” Greatness in God’s eyes is not found in moral perfection or religious rectitude. Rather, it is found in brokenness and humility, as a consequence of a correct appraisal of ourselves - the kind of self-appraisal that was forced upon David in the aftermath of his adultery with Bathsheba and the murder of her husband Uriah:
There are two key verses we would do well to keep in mind when we are tempted to disillusion ourselves: